Monday, November 30, 2015

Krampus will scare the bejesus out of your kids

5 second plot: When Max stops believing in Christmas an ancient evil entity called 'Krampus' comes to town. To punish all infidels.

5 second review: I was surprised to see that this Christmas-movie-with-an-attitude is very well made. It's not really scary for grown ups but I wouldn't take my kids to see it. They will have nightmares forever.

IMDb score: 6,6/10
Our score: 7/10

Sunday, November 29, 2015

The Walking Dead Season 6 Episode 8: Start to Finish (mid-season finale)

5 second plot: Alexandria is overrun by walkers. Most of the Alexandrians make it to a house. But then they are trapped. Diana is bitten. Morgan and Carol clash, which gives the W a chance to escape. Jessie's kids are losing it. Rick and the people he's with have to make a run for it. But there's a whole bunch of walkers standing between them and safety.

5 second review: It's not the action packed episode I imagined it would be, but it's still very tense. There's not a lot of fighting going on, it's mostly hiding. And now we have to wait for 2,5 months to see how it will turn out. The horror...

IMDb score: 8,5/10
Our score: 8,5/10

Saturday, November 28, 2015

Ash vs Evil Dead Season 1 Episode 5-10 is a crazy funny stretch

5 second plot:
Ep 5 The Host: The team tries to get the demon out of Kelly. But this demon is more powerful (and manipulative) than they thought.
Ep 6 The Killer of Killers: The cop catches up with Ash and ends up joining the team.
Ep 7 Fire in the Hole: On their way to the original cabin (to finish it all) the team runs into an armed militia that thinks they are the bad guys.
Ep 8 Ashes to Ashes: Ash arrives at the cabin. His evil hand grows another Ash. And this evil Ash kills cop-lady.
Ep 9 Bound in Flesh: The happy campers show up. It does not end well for them. Revenge-lady saves the day.
Ep 10 The Dark One: All the pieces of the puzzle fall into place. Ash has to make a difficult decision.

5 second review: The first half of the first season is ridiculously awesome. The second half is a bit of a stretch. But still a lot of crazy funny dialogue and lots of over the top gore. The final episode doesn't make total sense, but I guess we're good to go for a second season.

IMDb score: 8,9/10
Our score: 9/10

Wednesday, November 25, 2015

Brooklyn is for romantic souls

5 second plot: Eilis is a sweet Irish girl who travels to America (guess which city) in the 1950s. She is very homesick. Until she meets Tony. They fall in love. But then something happens that makes her go back to Ireland. And now she's torn apart by having to choose between her old home and her new one.

5 second review: This is a beautiful and sweet romance. Nothing really spectacular happens, it's all about the little things in life. But those are often the things people care about the most.

IMDb score: 8/10
Our score: 7/10

Sunday, November 22, 2015

The Walking Dead Season 6 Episode 7: Heads Up

5 second plot: Glenn survived. He’s trying to get back to let his wife know he’s alright. The walkers haven’t gotten through the wall yet, but the guard tower right next to the wall isn’t as stable as it should be. Rick finds out that Morgan let some of the W’s go.

5 second review: Just as they start to relax a little bit and make plans for the future, shit hits the fan. Man, they are going to have their hands full in the next episode (the mid-season finale). Glenn isn’t dead. So now I feel stupid. But I’m glad he's still alive. The zombies look amazing (again). I’m predicting that the little fucker Rick gave a gun to is going to shoot Carl in the head. Mark my words, I can feel it coming.

IMDb score: 9,1/10
Our score: 8,5/10

Saturday, November 21, 2015

Ash vs Evil Dead Season 1 Episode 4: Brujo

5 second plot: Ash and his crew are on the move. They are heading for Pablo's uncle. He's got spiritual powers and may be able to help them with their deadite situation. Kelly is not feeling well. The demon from the previous episode hit her harder then she thought. We find out more about the mystery woman that's always one step behind Ash. She's the daughter of the original cast that got 'Ashed'.

5 second review: Still fucking perfect. Ash for president!

IMDb score: 8,5/10
Our score: 10/10

Friday, November 20, 2015

Jessica Jones Season 1 Episode 1: AKA Ladies Night

5 second plot: We meet private investigator Jessica Jones. A troubled young woman with superstrength who is very good at what she does (investigating with an attitude). In this pilot episode she's looking for a missing girl. But there's something about this girl that feels familiar. Not in a good way.

5 second review: This is a very decent first episode. I didn't buy the drinking problem though, but I did buy the troubled bad ass vibe. There's no origin story here. We just have to figure it out as it goes a long so it seems. That's very original. I like it.

IMDb score: 8,5/10
Our score: 8/10

Legend is slick

5 second plot: In the 1960's the London underworld was ruled by the Kray twins. One of them was smart, slick and had a good eye for business. The other one was a dangerous psychopath that belonged in a mental institution. But when he's your brother, what are you going to do?

5 second review: Tom Hardy is one hell of an actor. His portrayal of these two lunatics is pitch perfect. They are so different that it's almost unbelievable it's the same actor portraying them both. I love the cool 'we're-not-scared-of-anyone' gangsta shit, but unfortunately this story is also about the boring parts of their lives.

IMDb score: 7,3/10
Our score: 7,5/10

Carol is marvelous

5 second plot: Two woman fall in love in a time when everyone still makes a big fuss about it.

5 second review: Well... nothing really happens... but what a marvelously beautiful picture this is. Some will call it boring, others will call it subtle. But one thing's for sure: good job convincing us these woman desire each other big time.

IMDb score: 7,6/10
Our score; 5/10

Thursday, November 19, 2015

The Big Bang Theory Season 9 Episode 9: The Platonic Permutation

5 second plot: It’s Thanksgiving. Penny and Leonard stay at home to celebrate their first Thanksgiving as husband and wife. Sheldon and Amy go visit the aquarium as friends. And the rest of the gang volunteers at the homeless shelter.

5 second review: Aside from the horrible acting by the guest actor and Leonard wearing woman’s lingerie, this was a great episode. Good dialogue and smart ass funny.

IMDb score: 8,9/10
Our score: 8/10

Monday, November 16, 2015

Ash vs Evil Dead Season 1 Episode 3: Books from Beyond

5 second plot: Ash and his crew arrive at the bookstore. Ash hopes the owner can help put a lid on the bull-shit. They decide to summon a weaker demon to ask him how to undo the spell. Of course: this plan back-fires. We also get the origin story of the book.

5 second review: I don't know how it's possible that every new episode tops the already perfect previous one. There must be evil forces at work here. Ash is just talking crazy all the time and making everyone believe that it's normal. The effects are really good this episode. The demon they summon is awesome. This is becoming my new favorite show. Fuck GoT and the WD! (I didn't really mean that.)

IMDb score: 9,4/10
Our score: 10/10

The Hunger Games: Mockingjay - Part 2 is a weird goodbye

5 second plot: Katniss Everdeen is on her way to the capitol with a simple plan: to kill president Snow.

5 second review: I'm glad the franchise finally got to its conclusion, and I couldn't in a million years figure out a way to conclude it better, but it just doesn't feel right. Although it has been stretched out way too long (movie 3 and 4 should have been one movie, right?), the ending still feels rushed. So I'm not satisfied. But I can't say what would have satisfied me, so I'm just going to shut up.

IMDb score: 6,9/10
Our score: 6,5/10

Sunday, November 15, 2015

The Walking Dead Season 6 Episode 6: Always Accountable

5 second plot: This episode focuses on Daryl, Abraham and Sasha. On their way back to Alexandria (after successfully redirecting half of the herd) they get shot at and get separated. Daryl makes some new friends. Two woman and a guy who are on the run from another group. Abraham and Sasha wait for Daryl in a nearby town. They get their hands on a shit load of new cool stuff. Like a bazooka.

5 second review: It gets very interesting yet again. This new group Daryl encountered is probably going to be be the one that is led by Negan (because he's coming, there is no other way to it). There are a lot of cool and original zombies this episode. The swamp thang zombie tops them all.

IMDb score: 8,6/10
Our score: 8,5/10

Friday, November 13, 2015

Love the Coopers is sweet

5 second plot: Everyone in the Cooper family is coming together for the holidays. No-one is particularly happy with the way their lives are going but maybe this Christmas Eve can change all that.

5 second review: This is a sweet and heartwarming Christmas story. If that sentence already made you puke, it might be better to steer clear of this one. Because it gets worse: there's also singing and dancing. It's a good (light) story with very decent (and funny) dialogue. And an amazing cast.

IMDb score: 5,8/10
Our score: 7/10

Thursday, November 12, 2015

The Big Bang Theory Season 9 Episode 8: The Mystery Date Observation

5 second plot: Sheldon decides it's time to find himself a new girlfriend. He calls Raj and Howard to help him. Penny and Bernadette spend their evening spying on Amy to find out who her new boyfriend is.

5 second review: Spoiler alert! I love it when they mess with our heads like they do in this episode. A beautiful and smart woman shows up at Sheldon's doorstep. So you think: that's the new girlfriend, what a lucky bastard. And then he just slams the door in her face. Brilliant. Well, she WAS a couple of seconds too late.

IMDb score: 8/10
Our score: 8/10

Sunday, November 8, 2015

The Walking Dead Season 6 Episode 5: Now

5 second plot: Rick barely makes it back to Alexandria. He’s got half of the herd on his tail. So now the community is surrounded by walkers. But the walls are holding (for now). The original Alexandrians are losing it. They now realize it was a mistake not to learn how to protect themselves. Maggie wants to go out to find Glenn. Aaron is joining her, since he feels guilty for the Ws' attack (he lost his back-pack with the community’s intell).

5 second review: I’m glad that these walls are holding but we all know this isn’t going to last. They are going to have to take on the herd. If Glenn isn’t really dead, I’m going to feel really stupid. We’ve got some spectacular zombie attacks this episode. My favorite are the sewer-zombies. 

IMDb score: 8,3/10
Our score: 9/10

Saturday, November 7, 2015

Ash vs Evil Dead Season 1 Episode 2: Bait

5 second plot: Ash wants to get the Book of the Dead translated so he can send the deadites back from where they came. Kelly's mom is back from the dead. But Ash thinks the deadites are playing a trick on them.

5 second review: There is an awesome amount of blood gushing in everyone's face this episode. It's hilariously disgusting. The team-up between Ash and the two youngsters is perfect. This second episode confirms the brilliance of the first one. As a fan of the genre, I'm a very happy camper.

IMDb score: 9,5/10
Our score: 10/10

Friday, November 6, 2015

Spotlight is heavy shit

5 second plot: In 2001 a team of investigative reporters from the Boston Globe uncovers of story of child abuse by Catholic priests on a huge scale. And the cover-up that comes along with it on an ever bigger scale.

5 second review: This is not only a story about horrible child abuse, but it's also about investigative journalism. It runs like a thriller, these guys (and girl) can't believe what they're uncovering. It's a story that needs to be told and it's told perfectly. One thing that really pops out are the performances. Everyone is amazing.

IMDb score: 8,5/10
Our score: 8,5/10

The Hallow definitely had potential

5 second plot: Adam moves with his family to a remote location in Ireland. The locals believe the forest they live in belongs to the Hallow. And the Hallow don't like it when their forest is trampled on.

5 second review: At first this looks like a mysterious creeper. But it's actually an all out monster movie. The monsters are okay (most of them), but I did feel like the story would have been more effective if it had remained a bit more mysterious.

IMDb score: 5,9/10
Our score: 5/10

Thursday, November 5, 2015

Spectre sure is slick

5 second plot: Bond is still trying to figure out who is making his life so goddamn difficult. When he connects the dots it all leads to one organisation. Yes, it's the one from the title.

5 second review: Not as dramatic as the first one, not as spectacular as the second one, but still that sweet Bond movie vibe. This one's a real slick one. Just look at that beautiful opening sequence. I must say I did go 'you've got to be kidding me' an awful lot. I think it's got the highest number of far fetched moments of all of the Daniel Craig Bonds. But if you just go along with it, it's alright. 

IMDb score: 7,5/10
Our score: 7/10

The Big Bang Theory Season 9 Episode 7: The Spock Resonance

5 second plot: Sheldon is interviewed for a documentary about Spock. During the interview he freaks out about Amy breaking up with him (you know: Spock vs emotions). Bernadette tries to convince Howard to redecorate the house. But Howard doesn't want to change anything.

5 second review: It starts off with some really lame jokes but luckily it gets better. It's mostly about Sheldon being his typical self. There's also a hilarious moment where Howard comes into frame who has just been covered in dust.

IMDb score: 8,5/10
Our score: 8/10

Tuesday, November 3, 2015

The Walking Dead Season 6 Episode 4: Here's Not Here

5 second plot: We find out how Morgan got to be who he is today. He was all crazy and completely lost. Killing the dead and the living, everything that crossed his path. And then he met this awesome relaxed guy with mad stick fighting skills and a prison cell in his cabin. This guy succeeded in getting Morgan out of his killer-coma.

5 second review: This is a somewhat smaller, slower story and I have to say that it was a good idea to let us catch our breath after the previous hectic episodes. But of course, now we haven't learned anything new from team Rick. And I'm hearing people say Glenn isn't really dead. What? Don't give me hope, man. I saw his guts being torn out.

IMDb score: 8,9/10
Our score: 9,5/10