Monday, December 6, 1982

Gandhi is one hell of a biography

5 second plot: It's the biography of the man in the title, from his young years as a lawyer in South Africa to his death in his motherland India. He wanted the world to be a better place, with everyone living peacefully side by side. He conquered a lot of hearts and made the world a little bit better by being who he was.

5 second review: I could almost not believe that everything in the movie really actually happened. But shamefully... it did. It is an amazing story and it couldn't have been told better. But he is pictured as a bit of a drama queen, no? The clothes, the walk, the talk,... Did I just call this amazing man a drama queen? Sorry 'bout that.

IMDb score: 8,1/10
Our score: 5/10

Wednesday, November 17, 1982

1990: The Bronx Warriors is one of those movies

5 second plot: A rich girl from Manhattan flees to the Bronx where several gangs rule the streets. An evil corporation/the cops have plans to turn the gangs against each other and clean house.

5 second review: You can only enjoy this if you like '80s Italian sci-fi old school VHS memorabilia. It's fun to be able to say that you watched the movie, but it's not always a pleasant experience to be watching it. The most bizarre thing for me is the posture of the lead character 'Trash'. The way he stands, walks, fights or even rides a motorcycle is one of the weirdest thing I have ever seen in a movie. It looks like he's trying to hold onto something between his butt-cheeks the entire time.

IMDb score: 5,3/10
Our score: 3/10

Wednesday, October 20, 1982

Stalker is excruciatingly boring

5 second plot: There is a place in the world called 'The Zone' where everyone stays as far away from as possible. Those who go near it, are never seen again. One guy who seems to know the way in and out (a bit) takes two other guys in. They are trying to find 'The Room' that can grant wishes. Or something like that.

5 second review: I truly hate this experimental bullshit. It moves excruciatingly sloooowly. This must be the dumbest 'sci-fi' movie ever made. They act like there is a whole lot of mystery going on, but we only get to see plants and buildings and some strange shit. This movie really sucks.

IMDb score: 8,2/10
Our score: 0/10

Friday, June 25, 1982

Blade Runner is extraordinary

5 second plot: Deckard is a blade runner in a futuristic Los Angeles. He has to track down and kill four replicants.

5 second review: It all looks a bit retro and the story moves along way too slow for a modern audience, but it's still very awesome and mega cool. This is not only thanks to the extraordinary visuals but also because of the interesting ensemble of actors. They all look great. If possible, you should try to see this movie on a big screen.

IMDb score: 8,2/10
Our score: 9/10

Wednesday, February 10, 1982

Das Boot is probably as realistic as it can get

5 second plot: This is the story of the men working in a German U-boat in World War II. We get an insider look at all the difficulties they have to deal with. There are several occasions where they almost get blasted to the bottom of the ocean. But between the battles, it's not exactly a picnic neither.

5 second review: There is no doubt about it that this is a must see classic for all film fans. If you're claustrophobic, it's not going to be an easy watch. The movie gives you a terrifying look at the horror and randomness of a gruesome war like WWII. It's so well done, that you will be grasping for air together with the men that are really running out of it.

IMDb score: 8,5/10
Our score: 8/10