Sunday, November 30, 2014

The Walking Dead Season 5 Episode 8: Coda (mid season finale)

5 second plot: Rick catches up with the cop that got away. It does not end well for the cop. Gabriel gets the church overrun by walkers. Abraham arrives just in time to save the day. Rick and co prepare the exchange to get Beth and Carol back. But goddamned, they really can't catch a break.

5 second review: This episode will leave you hanging with that horrible Walking Dead feeling of injustice. It's a great episode, but what a wake up call... again. There are not many shows out there that can kick you in the nuts like this one.

IMDb score: 9,3/10
Our score: 9/10

Saturday, November 29, 2014

Predestination pushes every boundary in the book

5 second plot: A time travelling agent has been looking for a bomber (one that will blow up half of New York) all his life. Now he's on his final mission. This mission starts by listening to a guy that walks into a bar.

5 second review: I'm not even going to try to tie the knots on this one. The person that came up with this story is either brilliantly smart or nuts beyond comprehension. It's awesome. If you're looking for a complex story that will knock you off your feet, this is the one you want to see. It will blow your mind. And to say I was very skeptical at first about the stupid looking time travelling device... Boy, was I wrong...

IMDb score: 7,5/10
Our score: 9,5/10

Friday, November 28, 2014

The Babadook isn't very scary after all

5 second plot: A single mom is struggling with her difficult son. He is fixated on a scary monster that visits him mostly at night. Things get really out of hand. Of course his mom doesn't believe him. That is until she experiences some strange stuff herself.

5 second review: It takes a very long time for this party to get started. The idea is probably to build the tension up slowly. But for me it took too long. Lots of people say this is the scariest movie of the year but I have to disagree. Some things will stick with me for a long time (that voice: BA BA DOOOOOK) but not enough scary stuff happens to let it all stick.

IMDb score: 7,1/10
Our score: 6,5/10

Thursday, November 27, 2014

Two and a Half Men Season 12 Episode 5: Oontz, Oontz, Oontz

5 second review: The pretty (single) social worker asks the guys if they would be interested in adopting a 6 year old boy named Louis. Walden gets really excited and buys half the toy store. The kid doesn't open up immediately. But then he finds a soul-mate in Berta.

5 second review: Well, it's official. Jake's out. He even gets a (hilarious) best of goodbye sequence. It's a good call to go for a cute 6-year-old. That way they fast forward to the funnier years. Because Alan and Walden with a baby would have been too much slapstick and too little smart ass.

IMDb score: 5,7/10
Our score: 8/10

Wednesday, November 26, 2014

Penguins of Madagascar do what they do best

5 second plot: Skipper, Kowalski, Rico and Private are penguins with amazing skills. Together they can take on the world. For this adventure they team up with The North Wind to stop an evil octopus named Dave.

5 second review: It's not that I laughed my ass off from beginning to end, but there is some very original funny stuff happening throughout the movie. A lot of this funniness is already in the trailer, but luckily it's repeat-viewing-proof.

IMDb score: 6,9/10
Our score: 6,5/10

Horrible Bosses 2 brings it home

5 second plot: The guys are done working for a boss and decide to start a business of their own. They invent a shower-thing but almost immediately get screwed over by their first business partner. They decide to kidnap his son and get their money back. But not everything goes as planned.

5 second review: I didn't think this was going to be a funny movie. Not in a million years. But it is. You have to love stupid jokes that you've probably seen a million times already. I laughed my ass off. If you're not sure, just give the movie 10 minutes. If you crack up, you'll love it. If you don't, you'll hate it.

IMDb score: 6,9/10
Our score: 8/10

Tuesday, November 25, 2014

Serena is textbook drama

5 second plot: It's 1929. George has got a big timber company. He falls madly in love with Serena and marries her. Their life is perfect and they decide to have a kid. But the pregnancy doesn't go as planned. And then it all falls to pieces.

5 second review: Great performances and amazing cinematography, but what a heartbreaking story. This is drama pur sang. It can't get any more drama than this. And they don't shy away from the fact that there was no Greenpeace back in the day. Chopping trees and looking for panthers to kill...

IMDb score: 5,8/10
Our score: 5/10

Monday, November 24, 2014

Laggies is not a good title

5 second plot: Megan feels disconnected from the world around her. Her best friends don't get her jokes anymore, her dad cheats on her mom and her boyfriend asks her to marry him. She snaps and decides to take a week 'off'. Luckily she recently got a new friend where she can stay.

5 second review: This is a basic romantic comedy. The first part of the movie (the set-up) is terrible. But then all of a sudden Sam Rockwell enters the room and the movie comes alive. So the middle part is okay. The final part is way too much drama and too little comedy but it all turns out well in the end. One more thing though: what's up with that horrible title?

IMDb score; 6,8/10
Our score: 6,5/10

Sunday, November 23, 2014

Reach Me is happy feel good

5 second plot: A mystery man writes a motivational book that inspires a lot of people to drastically (but positively) turn their lives around. Somehow the stories of all these totally different people intertwine and result in everyone helping each other out one way or another.

5 second review: You have to be a sucker for happy go lucky stuff to like this movie. If you're not, stay away from it. There are a lot of characters and every single one of them seems to be a familiar face. Why did all these famous people want to be in this movie? They're probably all suckers for happy go lucky stuff. Sly gets a bit overexcited but overall this is a nicely filmed, loose, cool movie with decent performances.

IMDb score: not yet rated on posting date
Our score: 8/10

The Walking Dead Season 5 Episode 7: Crossed

5 second plot: Our favorite group of survivors reinforces the church and then most of them are off to save Carol and Beth. They have a plan, but the people they are taking on are seriously clever. Meanwhile the group that was on its way to Washington is trying to keep it together. That is not going well for Abraham.

5 second review: I like Tara's way of dealing with the set-back. She's getting all smart ass funny. Gabriel's wining was getting on my nerves at first, but then all of a sudden he's up to something. That's interesting. It would be nice to see our good people catch a break in the near future. They try again and again to trust other people. And they always end up screwed. Special zombies of the week: stuck zombies and melted zombies.

IMDb score: 8,9/10
Our score: 8,5/10

Friday, November 21, 2014

The Hunger Games: Mockingjay - Part 1 is a stretch

5 second plot: Katniss is now in District 13, where the rebels are hiding underground. They need support from all the other districts to have a winning chance at fighting the Capitol. To unite all districts Katniss becomes the face of the rebellion: the mockingjay.

5 second review: I know it's easy to say this 'Part 1' is too slow, but it's pretty obvious there was only enough story for one movie and it's been stretched out to make two. However, there is still a lot going on and a lot of cool stuff to be seen. And I am a big sucker for this powerful rebel spirit: people who have lost everything but still believe in the cause, because it's a just one. So I'm looking forward to the grand finale. But I think future viewers will watch all four movies back to back. And they will definitely be complaining about the stretched out third one.

IMDb score: 7,1/10
Our score: 7/10

A Girl Walks Home Alone at Night is something else

5 second plot: Arash is having a tough time living in Bad City. His father is a junkie and his father’s drug dealer takes his car, the one thing he’s really proud of, to cover the expenses. But his luck changes for the better when a vampire girl kills the dealer and enters his life.

5 second review: I’m usually not a big fan of these weird and 'style-focused' movies. But this one’s not bad. It’s an Iranian/American production, spoken in Persian and in black and white. It’s certainly not for everyone. Not very much happens but it’s a sweet and somewhat interesting story.

IMDb score: 7,1/10
Our score: 6/10

Thursday, November 20, 2014

Two and a Half Men Season 12 Episode 4: Thirty-Eight, Sixty-Two, Thirty-Eight

5 second plot: Walden makes the house safe for children. The guys meet a pregnant woman who wants them to adopt her soon to be born baby. While having a celebration party they get a call that their baby is on his way. He's a really cute little fella. But there's a tiny problem.

5 second review: The bromance doesn't really work. It's just not funny. I think it's because Alan is really gay. He has been since season 1. I was always wondering when he was going to come out of the closet. And a bromance like this is only funny with two really straight guys.

IMDb score: 6,7/10
Our score: 6/10

The Big Bang Theory Season 8 Episode 10: The Champagne Reflection

5 second plot: Sheldon and Amy record the last episode of 'Fun With Flags'. Leonard, Raj and Howard clean out the office of a professor that passed away. And reflect on the meaning of life. Penny and Bernadette go to an employee reception. Bernadette finds out that she's a monster.

5 second review: The Fun With Flags sketches are great. Well, everything else is too, actually. Penny's looks surprise me every time. She's a looker.

IMDb score: 7,2/10
Our score: 8,5/10

Sunday, November 16, 2014

The Walking Dead Season 5 Episode 6: Consumed

5 second plot: Daryl and Carol are following the car with the white cross, hoping it will lead them to Beth. They get stuck in the city. With lots of zombies. And then they meet a friend of a friend.

5 second review: Daryl and Carol are awesome survivors. They adapted to their changed environment perfectly. And they are good people. They still have a heart. It's great to see some new places, watching them find safe spots, going where no man has gone in a long time. Special zombies of the week: sleeping bag zombies, tent zombies and jumper zombies. Awesome.

IMDb score: 8,7/10
Our score: 9/10

Friday, November 14, 2014

Foxcatcher is not very entertaining

5 second plot: This is the true story of two brothers who won a gold medal in wrestling in the 1984 Olympics. Although they are top athletes they don't live a luxurious life. That all changes when they team up with John du Pont, one of the richest guys in the country. Who is very interested in wrestling. But he's kind of a nutcase with serious mommy issues.

5 second review: Maybe it wasn't such a good idea to make this movie with famous actors. Because we know how Channing Tatum and Steve Carell look like very well. And it was hard for me to get used to their weird looking faces and body language in this movie. But there's some awesome acting going on here, that's for sure. However, I'm not a big fan of these dreadfully boring and painfully sad movies.

IMDb score: 7,5/10
Our score: 4/10

Starry Eyes is mysteriously creepy

5 second plot: Sarah wants to become a famous actress, but it's not working out the way she had hoped. And she's starting to lose her marbles. But it so happens that there is a production company looking for someone who flips out every once in awhile.

5 second review: This movie made me uncomfortable multiple times. It's mysterious. It's creepy. And just as you start to wonder: 'how is this a horror movie?' shit hits the fan real hard. Holy crapper. Just wait for it. There is some seriously gross shit in this one. It's fucking awesome.

IMDb score: 6,2/10
Our score: 8/10

Dumb and Dumber To is not a classic

5 second plot: Harry finds out that Lloyd has been faking his coma (Is it a coma? I don't really know.) for 20 years. Just to mess with him. Harry is in desperate need of a kidney transplant. The guys go on a quest to find a relative willing to donate the vital organ.

5 second review: As a really big fan of the original, I was almost afraid to watch this one. Afraid that it would screw up the cult vibe the first one's got going for itself. But this sequel is not bad. It's not as good as the first one (not by far) and it doesn't really add anything to the original story, but on itself, it's okay. Not very much is going on, but it's stupid fun. I had to laugh really hard a couple of times.

IMDb score: 6,4/10
Our score: 6,5/10

Thursday, November 13, 2014

Two and a Half Men Season 12 Episode 3: Glamping in a Yurt

5 second plot: Walden and Alan have to convince a (very beautiful) social worker that they are a happily married couple. To prepare themselves they try to get comfortable with physical affection. Lindsay just got out of rehab. And she wants to give it another try.

5 second review: The writers really love the sex talk. I don't know where they keep getting the jokes. Alan is going to realize he's gay for real soon. Why didn't they call this episode 'Charlie Sheen doesn't live here anymore'? You can't miss an opportunity like that.

IMDb score: 6,4/10
Our score: 8/10

The Big Bang Theory Season 8 Episode 9: The Septum Deviation

5 second plot: Leonard has to have surgery (something with his nose). It's a standard procedure but Sheldon is worried (that Leonard is going to die). Raj's parents split up. He's not taking it well. And it's making Howard and Bernadette think about their marriage.

5 second review: This episode is almost perfect. It's great fun. Only the quibbling between Bernadette and Howard is getting a bit old.

IMDb score: 7,7/10
Our score: 9/10

Sunday, November 9, 2014

The Walking Dead Season 5 Episode 5: Self Help

5 second plot: Abraham and 'his' group are on the move. He is really determined to push through to Washington and won't listen to anyone trying to deviate from his plan. The church bus they started with goes flying through the air after a couple of miles. Eugene needs to get something off his chest. Abraham is not going to like it.

5 second review: I love it when they're on the road like this. They're constantly improvising and trying to stay ahead. Abraham talks a bit like in the comics in this episode: 'I really need some ass first.' His 'sweet' talk is his trademark in the comics. I also love the way they make us (the viewers) feel like we are there: 'what's that smell?'. Yuk.

IMDb score: 8,7/10
Our score: 9/10

Friday, November 7, 2014

Jessabelle is not terrible at all

5 second plot: Jessabelle loses her husband and unborn child in a car crash. She is confined to a wheelchair but should be able to walk again after a couple of months of therapy. She returns home to stay with her dad, the only relative she has left. There's a presence in the house that wants to tell her something.

5 second review: Although it felt like I'd seen it already a thousand times before and a lot of the things that happen are just too convenient for the plot advancement to be credible, this movie still scared the crap out of me. There are a couple of seriously disturbing images in here. Also, I really wanted to know what was going on. Which are the two main objectives of a movie like this: scare the bejesus out of people and have you wondering what's going on. So job well done I guess?

IMDb score:  5,4/10
Our score: 7/10

Big Hero 6 is a whole lot of fun

5 second plot: Hiro is a very smart young fella who's very interested in robotics. He teams up with Baymax, an inflatable health-care robot and a group of friends to fight a super-villain with evil plans.

5 second review: This is a great story about friendship and doing the right thing. The movie works best for a kid's mind and imagination because as an adult it felt like a little bit 'much' from time to time. But still, it's awesome fun. Tip of the day: there's a great cameo after the end credits.

IMDb score: 8,1/10
Our score: 7,5/10

Thursday, November 6, 2014

Comedians in Cars Getting Coffee Season 5 is more relaxed

5 second plot: Kevin Hart, Amy Shumer, Bill Burr, Miranda Sings, Fred Armisen, Ali Wentworth and Jimmy Fallon all get to ride along in a cool car and drink some coffee with Jerry Seinfeld. Jimmy Fallon is so much fun he gets two episodes. Jerry even takes him out for a spin on his boat. And to his favorite pancake house.

5 second review: This season most of the comedians aren't intimidated by Jerry. He doesn't overshadow them. That makes it more fun, because the more relaxed these boys and girls are, the funnier they get. Jerry also added some sketches with the so called president of Crackle. These bits suck big time. But here the added value of the webisode format comes into play. You can simply skip this crap.

IMDb score: 8,3/10
Our score: 8,5/10

Two and a Half Men Season 12 Episode 2: A Chic Bar in Ibiza

5 second plot: Alan en Walden want to get married so that Walden can adopt a kid. They almost immediately start quibbling like a married couple. Starting off with a fight over the prenup.

5 second review: Well, it's official. They decided to take the path of the bromance. I hope I don't get sick of the jokes surrounding that decision too quickly. This episode's still okay so I'll keep my hopes up.

IMDb score: 6,6/10
Our score: 7/10