The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey is everything it's supposed to be

5 second plot: A hobbit, a wizard and a bunch of dwarfs are going on a dangerous adventure to kick the evil fire dragon Smaug out of the dwarf kingdom in the Lonely Mountain.

5 second review: It's quite incredible how Peter Jackson always delivers what the world expects of him, even if expectations are unbelievably high. And the stakes as well. For me, there are several moments that I don't like, mostly the big CGI scenes like the one with the trolls. But overall, it's a great adventure.

IMDb score: 8/10
Our score: 8/10

Silent Night is very decent

5 second plot: A killer Santa selects a quiet little town to go and kill a bunch of people. And he likes to kill spectacularly. The local cops are on his tail but they don't really have the expertise to deal with this kind of psycho.

5 second review: This is a very decent slashermovie! It surprised me very much. If you are a fan of classic slashers, where blood seems to fly all over the place, this is a must see for you. Nice job. I don't understand why the IMDb score is so low. Probably because, for most people, it's not okay to fuck with Santa.

IMDb score: 5,1/10
Our score: 7/10

Life of Pi

2 sec plot: Boy gets stuck on a lifeboat with a tiger after his ship sinks.

2 sec review: This really is a very beautiful film but the end is a bit disappointing.

IMDb score: 8,1/10
Our score: 7/10

Cloud Atlas

5 second plot: This story is a journey through time, covering several millenniums and unraveling separate stories that are connected through the souls of the participants.

5 second review: It is a long movie, but a lot happens in it, so it's not a drag, but it is somewhat of a challenge to hang in there until the end.

IMDb score: 7,7/10
Our score: 7/10
Box Office Mojo: 130 mio $ worldwide (on 23-05-2013)

American Horror Story Season 2: Asylum is ridiculous

5 second plot: The year is 1964, the location is an insane asylum run by the church. This season mixes the story of serial killers, a Nazi doctor, alien abductions, a possession, human flesh eating monsters, the angel of death herself and a lot of crazy folk into one (not very) coherent whole. Even Anne Frank gets to make an appearance.

5 second review: There is simply too much stuff in the mix here. There are some very cool and memorable scenes (the angel of death), but it's not more than that. The first 4 episodes are completely ridiculous and the last 3 are a boring stretch simply to get to the cool total of 13. Good performances from the cast, but the story is a very big mess.

IMDb score: 8,4/10
Our score: 4/10

V/H/S is unsettling

5 second plot: A group of fucked up friends breaks into a house and starts watching some videos. We (the viewers) also get to see these (disturbing) short stories. We've got (something like) a vampire, a couple of psycho-killers (one of them sort of supernatural), ghosts, a haunted house and I think even aliens.

5 second review: The quality of the film (VHS ya know) is very bad. I know it's the whole idea but that doesn't make it less annoying. However. I must say the movie surprised me more than once. You simply don't know what's coming next. And it scared the shit out of me here and there. So. Not bad at all.

IMDb score: 5,8/10
Our score; 7/10

Two and a Half Men Season 10

5 second plot: Jake is a cook in the army; they try to keep him away from guns. Walden meets and loses a lot of woman. Alan is with Lindsey through most of the season but she dumps him at the end.

5 second review: They try to keep this show as fresh as possible. And it is working. They introduce a lot of great side characters that give the show new mojo. The jokes are still amazing, you kind of wonder where they keep getting the stuff. The running joke about kicking Alan out of the house is getting a bit old though.

IMDb score: 7,3/10
Our score: 9/10

The Seasoning House is quite depressing

5 second plot: Set in the Balkans during the war, this is a story of young girls who are enslaved into prostitution for the soldiers. A deaf girl is enslaved as the boss's angel and has to take care of the 'house'. One day the soldiers that killed her family show up. And she fights back.

5 second review: We are in the Balkans. And everyone speaks English. With a Eastern European accent. It happens often in movies like these, but I will never get used to it. The subject of this film is horrifying. I like a good horror movie now and then, but this is far from fun to watch. There are some great performances in here. And a couple of good bad guy killings as well. But overall: very depressing.

IMDb score: 6/10
Our score: 6/10

Twixt is painfully bad

5 second plot: A writer of witch stories ends up in a small town where he dreams a great new story. The question is why he is dreaming about stuff that probably really happened?

5 second review: No way this was directed by the real Francis Ford Coppola. This movie is horrible. It's one of the worst I have ever seen. And that's saying something. Is he completely losing his mind?

IMDb score: 4,9/10
Our score: 0/10

The Tall Man

2 second plot: In Cold Rock every couple of months a child goes missing, never to be heard of again.

2 second review: Cold, dark and mysterious with a strange twist that should take everyone by surprise.

IMDb score: 5,9/10
Our score: 7,5/10
Box Office Mojo: 5 mio $ worldwide (on 20-05-2013)